I never knew a world like yours until you walked into mine. Captivating, mind-boggling, your eyes never faultered to look in my eyes with such intensity it took my breath away. -MyrandaElayneBurton.

It's crazy how one minute, my day is horrible & people just can't stop sucking. Then the next, I see you & everything's okay. People aren't too irritating & things aren't so bad. Life is livable. It's crazy how I'll be thinking of how much you're pissing me off, then I'll see you and all that flies out the window. It's crazy how I feel like I don't need to eat when your around, like I only need your love to survive. It's crazy how I love everything about you, when on anybody else I'd think it was ridiculous or pathetic. It's crazy what I feel for you. It's crazy how much I feel for you. It's crazy how much I believe you feel it too.

Last year, I made a set using this picture and made a sort of bucket list type thing of what qualities I wanted for myself. This is it:
 
I wish I were strong. I wish I were skinny. I wish I were tan. I wish I had the guts to get a bullybutton peircing. I wish everyone liked me as a friend. I wish my hair would always look perfect. I wish I sang like Christina Aguilera. I wish I weren't so awkward. I wish my skin didn't have imperfections. I wish I were confident. I wish I didn't care. I wish I didn't overanalyize every little thing. I wish I knew what love was. I wish I didn't always try to be something I'm not. I wish I were sure. I wish I knew all the answers to life.
I'd had all the wishes right after school started eighth grade year. One wish came true. I do know what love is.
 
Those are my exact words. When I looked back at that today, I couldn't help but think of how stupid I was. I wanted to erase the words, pretend they'd never happened. I decided there was no way I could go back and make them never happen, and I would just edit it. I want to say what I think I've accomplished now. Here we go:
 
I am strong. I am the perfect size. Okay, not tan but who cares? Still no guts. I don't care if you like me or not. Nobody's hair is always perfect. I can only sing like me, and that's good enough. Awkward is the new sexy. Uhh, that's what make-up's for. I don't overanalyze everything. I know what it feels to love and be loved, but I don't know the definition. I am who I am. It is impossible to be sure of everything but I try. Not even Yoda has all the answers to life, but the wish remains mine.
 
There. That's better.

this sucks.
its sucks how i just now realized how much it hurt you that i went away. it sucks how i was so caught up with myself, i didn't even think to help you cope. it sucks how selfish i was, how stupid i was to not see it. we were supposed to be friends, & i let you down. i am so sorry. that set you made brought tears to my eyes. savage tears because i was so infuriated with myself. i'm just so sorry.

I know a girl. I know her because she was supposed to be my friend. Turns out she was kinda a shitty one. She stole the guy I liked after I told her how much I liked him. I forgave her though. Why did I forgive her? I forgave her because I know her. I know her well enough to know she has a crappy father - one who calls her to tell her to go f*ck herself & that he never wants to talk to her again. I know her so well that I know she kind of lost herself after that. She became depressed and all she wanted was attention, for someone to remind her who she was. She got the attention long enough for people to put her in a rehab center. After that, she was good long enough to get out. When she did, she just got worse - started doing drugs, having sex, trying to fill a void that had been there for so long. Nobody could fill it but her dad but she kept trying to. She became so sad, her mother got her ant-depressants. These made her bubbly and happy but she still had bad judgement. & Before, when she was aware of the coinciquences of her bad decisions, now she thought everything was gonna be okay. She is basically unconcsious to the real world. The deep-down part of her that was still depressed wanted someone to believe in her again. But everyone she cared about had lost all faith that she would ever be okay again. & Sometimes all you need is for someone to say "Everything's gonna be okay,"

Just a couple months ago, I was a prisoner. Locked in chains, held captive by my own mind, my own insecurities. They made me weak, defenseless against all the mean things people would say. Those chains somehow convinced me everything they said was true. They held me down, kept me from flying. Since then, I have met people that have brought me up, convinced me that I didn't see myself clearly, gave me confidence again. It took awhile but I am free now, and I don't care what people think now, not as much. Because of those people, I can fly.
 
This is in dedication for Amanda Todd, because (God bless her heart) she didn't have friends like mine who brought me up, convinced me I was worth two shits. She may have if she'd just stayed around a little longer, if someone (SOMEONE) had pitied her maybe she'd still be around. And even in her death we don't see it, we don't care, have become desensitized to it. I don't know about you, but that scares me. You shouldn't want to forget pain because that pain reminds you why you can't let it happen again, to someone else. If you forget, what makes you any better?

You hurt me. If I thought about our time together forever, changed my mind about it a thousand times, I would know that. That doesn't mean I'm mad. No, I'm sure of that too. Because I know our break up was just as much my fault as it was yours. It would be unfair to put all my hurt on your shoulders. And I don't regret our time together. Someone once said "Don't ever regret someone that once made you happy." So I won't. And, boy, did he make me happy. I belive I loved you. Loved you more than I ever loved anyone or anything before. But I'm a teenager and I suppose that means I'm hormonal and don't know anything about love. Well, that's not true but another set would explain my thoughts on that. I don't care what anyone else thinks - I was in love. I miss it, you and I. There are things I don't miss but for the most part, I miss it all. You were my everything, I would've even stayed in Norman for you. If I knew you only from a distance I would still know you were the kind of person people write songs about.

I saw your face today. It was the first time in a while and it stunned me how it seemed to rip the bandage from my healing wound. My breath caught, and I was tempted to look at your other photos - just to see you a little while longer. When I did all I could think was "oh,"

It's time to be me. It's time to show what I can do. Time to believe again, and I want to. I want to breathe and know it's for a purpose, a good one. I wanna live for something that's more than me, more important than me. That's why I'm gonna trust in God, completely. Give everything to him. I know it will take a while for myself to let go but I'm willing to try.

I'm the kind of girl that thinks. A lot. To an extent that in her mind, things become what they never were and words are twisted to make it more comfortable for her. I'm the kind of girl who can be the greatest jokester in the group but only if she's comfortable around them. I'm the kind of girl who feels more comfortable with her Dad than her closest friends. The kind of girl who can't flirt worth crap, and it's obvious when she's trying to. I'm, also, the kind of girl that cries at everything. I cry when I'm frustrated, moved or touched, or overwhelmed. I'm the kind of girl who judges too soon, and wonders how someone prevents judgement. I'm the kind of girl who gives up too easily. Too easy to be trusted with any task. I'm the kind of girl who notices her imperfection too much. So much that insecurity has defined her. The kind of girl in which her mood can change by the smallest things such as certain movies or stupid things like taking a trip to the store, just my Dad & me. I'm the kind of girl that is still innocent enough to watch animated Disney movies from my childhood & my little brother's childhood and be completely entertained. I'm Myranda, which makes me my own kind of girl.

When things get really down and sucky, if that's even a word, I ask the world why. Why I it lets me breathe, why I woke up today because God knows I don't do anything important or worth living for. My life has & most likely always will be about me & only me. How I feel about this & that, how this will affect me, what I want. But how is that fair? People wake up everyday and help people, people who need it, live for God in a way I don't know if I'll ever be able to do. Some people may question my doubts and when I tell them they blame Satan. I don't think I could put it all on him, not to dismiss that Satan is real because I'm fairly sure he is as well as God. Actually after thinking about it, I know He's real. Whatever the case, I miss feeling like no one could stop me, my happiness. I miss not caring what anyone thought. I miss being me, and only me 100% of the time. I miss believing in love at first sight, and just knowing I'd be a singer someday, KNOWING I was good enough. Now I question my every move - what will the people around me think, would I look weird, do I have the talent it takes to achieve my dreams? The fact is, I don't know me. I can't make decisions for myself without coming up wrong. I am completely incompetent when it comes to the real world and I get by with a cute face and charming personality that only works with people I'm comfortable with. If I really want you to like me, I won't be me, fearing you won't like the real me. Easier to accept someone liking someone you pretend to be. So basically I end up hating having to pretend and be fake and judge because I am just a sad person, a person I never thought I'd be.